1. I am approximately 1 minute and 30 seconds into this movie and I already know it's going to be great. Super hyper girl, douchey-seeming fiance, overly loving/annoying mother with a hilarious accent, and Christmas music.
Notable Quotes already:
"What? Mexico?? Hillary, we have palm trees and sand here!" *jumps into douchemobile*
*nasal voice* "I need to know if that fiance of yours will eat yams. I've never met anyone who'd turn down my yam casserole!"
2. 3 minutes in - We've got the meet-cute. An adorably gorgeous man in a ridiculous outfit enters the picture. Obviously these two are meant for each other. I am satisfied. He also looks really familiar....
3. Senor Douche takes the little lady out to dinner, texts on his douche-phone, and tells her that her life's work is pointless and that she should spend her time planning dinners. Welp, I'm ready to ditch this loser already!
Girl: "Pittsburgh? What am I going to do in Pittsburgh?"
Douche: "Be my wife."
4. Woooooooooah, twist I didn't see coming! Hallmark, you've bested me! Not sure how to proceed with these bullet-points. No spoilies!
5. The mom is almost up there with the mom from Just Friends. I'm going to start practicing her accent. Oh, they just showed her face. She's Mrs. Brady!
6. I can't stop smiling at this man's face.
"Do you have any clothes that aren't stained with coffee or shaped like a giant cell phone?"
7. She made him ruin his hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8. Something cute just happened song-wise. Keep an eye out for some piano-playing. And adorable storytelling.
"There's Hillary! We'll do the... feet thing later."
9. Obligatory walk-in-on-a-man-naked scene. Thanks, movie-gods. Also, everyone in this movie sleeps naked. Prepare yourselves.
10. Oh good, the yams come back. *VOMIT*
11. Ok, so when families ruin the turkey on Thanksgiving they always go to some horrible restaurant. Does no one keep ANY other food at home? Like maybe some frozen steaks? Or chicken? Soup? I'm positive that you don't have to go out just because you ruin ONE part of the meal. What about the delicious sides??
"I asked for selzer... This looks like tap water with.. cheese in it?"
12. Ok, this is horrible of me, but during a lull in the plotline, I found this picture of Mr. Hottie with what appears to be a lazy-eyed female companion.
Update: I think this is his sister.
13. I really hate when parents make the son-in-law call them Mom and Dad. He has his own parents! Stop that!
14. Family forcing the couple to kiss and them realizing that they're really in love. This is my favorite part of all chick flicks!
15. More piano playing and weird singing... I don't like it now. Oh my gosh it's getting worse. I'm near tears. HAHAHAHAHA oh my gosh it got so awkward that it got good again. Watch for the faces they make and their crazy singing mouths.
16. The jig is up! The news is out! Mr. Douche strikes again!
17. This girl is an idiot. AN IDIOT! Also, this mother sucks.
18. MOMENT OF REALIZATION. Thank goodness, because it's getting past my bed time.
19. Hmm Mr. Douche has more muscles than I realized. Well hello there.. Mr. Pecs.
20. No spoilies, but I'm sure you will be pleased with the ending. It's ridiculous, yet adorable. This is Hallmark after all! A super random dog shows up though... everyone acts like he's their best friend and has been there the whole time...
HO HO HO or NO NO NO?
HO HO HO!